"Sex." It's gotta come up sometime.

Throughout this parenting experience I have always tried to be careful but reasonable when my child is exposed to the topic of sex. I find that at times I'm a little surprised that its all happening so fast. They first start taking some sort of human development class in elementary. Before you know it they're talking amongst themselves about sex and where babies come from. I try to handle topics as they arise and also as honestly as possible.
Perhaps not the best approach as my first question was "Mom, what's a vibrator?" I hadn't realized she was also listening to the radio as we drove home. That day I could have killed my local disc jockey. The word had come up as a caller described her most embarrassing moment. Uhhh... I was so embarrassed. I quickly said "a toy" thinking that would be the end of it. Boy, was I sooo wrong. She pressed on and asked more questions. "Eight is a wonderful age" I thought. As I answered her questions I fell deeper and deeper into what seemed to be more trouble. In retrospect it's a HILARIOUS story. She kept looking at me saying "Tell me the truth Mom." Her little puppy eyes put me in a stupid HONEST trance. I didn't want her to hear some garbage from her friends but who was I kidding. Did they even talk about such things in elementary?
The conversation ended with her saying "Ewww, girls are nasty!" I think about it today and still can't help but laugh out loud and blush. What can you expect I was only 24. A baby myself to the parenting game I had never encountered a situation or had been taught what to do in such a scenario. Thank goodness I'm living and learning but even more thanks are owed to her schools.
I'm thankful that now a days sex and it's topics are addressed as part of the curriculum. I was glad when she told me that her school counselors periodically sat them down and asked them questions? Teens were not only able to receive information about sexually transmitted diseases but also had the opportunity to speak on other issues like abuse and violence.
Not every child has a parent that will speak freely to them about sex and those who do might not know the right things to say.

Stern Words!

I'm sure its happened to the best of us. Your child, though smart sometimes, gets lazy in school and brings home bad grades. I say lazy because in any other circumstance that would benefit them they would mastermind any situation. This story starts with the call all parents dream of. "Mom, I got my report card."
Bad sign already. Not "I have great news!" or "Guess what?". It's "I got my report card."
Of course my response is "Really?" "So?" and then there's the sigh. I think it must of been mutual from the lapse in silence. "I got all B's and C's in the grades but I got two D's and and F on midterms." My mind said "WHAT!" but I quickly composed myself and asked God for some help.
In the past I've have been the strong arm of punishment. For Pete's sake I've punished this kid! I've taken away electronics, TV, phone use and privileges. I even cut her hair one time, made her breakup with her "boyfriend" and took away all her makeup. I thought for a moment, took a breath and then said this "Well.. you know what you have to do right? Because I don't believe that you need me to get all crazy right?" "No mom." she said.
My daughter, the smart one I referred to in the beginning had a plan. "I'm gonna start tutoring twice a week for math" she said. "Ah ha?" I replied. "And?" I continued. "No phone, no computer, no going out. I know. I know. " "Great" I said. "You have until you get your next interim report." She wasn't pleased in the least but at least I didn't have to raise my blood pressure.
Kids are funny sometimes. Parents know what to expect from their kids (I did see her slacking while she should have been studying) and kids well, they know whats coming to them (she told me at the end of the day when I was drained).
I can vividly remember knowing exactly what was going to through my father over the deep end. I also remember bracing myself for that punishment and when it didn't come I thought "Oh..oh..okay." I didn't know what to expect. Was he going catch me while I was sleeping or had I just disappointed him so much that he just stop caring?
I reflected on my past experiences and decided I'd try something new. She was punished passively and while she goes through her punishment I will encourage her and not harass her. I guess we'll see if this angle works in time.
If doesn't work we can always go back to "crazy". Hey, it works for some. :)

Loosening the Reigns, Maybe...

This week my daughter had exciting news for me. Her school was planning their first ever "Grad Adventure". A trip to Orlando without their parents. Actually, the first trip anywhere without her parents or family members. Am I worried? Eh....should I be? To be honest I am..a little.

When I was in middle school I had the privilege of attending my own 8Th grade trip. I had a blast! There was no drinking. There were no drugs. It was safe. Yes, there was the usual horsing around but nothing I perceive now as dangerous.

But haven't times changed? It seems that now a days you hear terrible stories about how these little knuckle heads are getting into all sort of crazy situations. Plus, on a bus...that I'm not following..ahy..I must admit it rattles my nerves. And the rides? Please, I don't even want to think about the crazy rides she's going to get herself on. Ugh.. and I almost forgot. Boys, yup there will be lots of them there.

I know... I must "chill". Everything is going to be fine. I will pray. LOL. It must have worked for my dad. I'm here and alive to tell the tale. Jeez, it's funny. I never thought how my parents felt when I first begged for the opportunity to go.

Do you remember the first time you were away from your parents

on a school trip? How did that go? Send me pics.